Steps for Finding THE One

Dating
This week I am going to talk about dating and how to do it right. First off all no one is asking out people on dates anymore! In college I feel like most people skip dinner and goes straight to hooking up. 20-30 years ago boys would actually ask girls out on dates and then drop them off at home without expecting anything else to happen after. During my first couple weeks of school I had some of the worst experiences because none of the boys knew what a date was… WELL let me tell you what a real date should be!
Secret to the Perfect Relationship
I am going to tell you a secret that is going to change the way you think about dating… the secret is to wait to get physically intimate before you really know the person… and no, you do not know the person after a week or even a month of dating someone.
The first step to get to know your potential girlfriend/boyfriend, is by spending lots of time together. You need to get to know the good and the bad sides, it is also very important to pick up on red flags. Next you need to talk to the person and share personal life stories because that is going to bond the two of you. The next step is trusting the person. You need to trust that your potential partner is going to love you and only you for the time that you are together, and maybe that is going to be forever. After you and your potential girlfriend/boyfriend establish trust, you need to see if they are reliable. Reliably is important because you need to know if your partner is capable of taking care of you. A good way to know if you can rely on your partner is to see if they are successful at school, their job, and if they have realistic future goals. If you know, trust, and can rely on your potential partner then you commit to that person. I advise that you only commit to a person if you are ready for marriage. You are just wasting you and your girlfriend/ boyfriend’s time if you are not willing to take the next step for marriage. The last step is the best one, which is physical touch. At this point you know that you can trust that your partner is not going to hurt you and you can rely on them to take care of you.
I am aware that it is extremely hard and not 100% realistic that you can wait 3 months to kiss someone that you really like. To be honest, my future husband kissed me the day after we met. My main point of this whole thing is to really KNOW the person who you are getting serious serious with before you get hurt.
My Love Story
On the Friday of my third week of my first semester I went to a rooftop party that my apartment complex was hosting. After the party was over my friends and I were standing on the sidewalk in front of my apartment because we were thinking of fun activities to do that night. Suddenly a few guys came up to my friends and I then asked if we wanted to go to a bonfire with them. All of my friends kindly denied but I was determined to meet some new people and have fun. A few minutes later, a convertible full of people pulled up to me. A cute boy who had red hair asked me to sit by him (my future husband, Ben). We all drove to the bonfire and I got to know Ben, he was literally the most fun person I have ever met. Ben and I ended up holding hands, cuddling, and talking from 1am-9am. I have never connected with a person so well in my entire life, I was so excited because Ben was so straight forward. As time went on Ben took me on super fun dates like scavenger hunts, traveling to Utah, and going sledding in the sand dunes. 4 months after I met Ben we got engaged and then 5 months after that we got married.
Did Ben and I get married super fast? Yes! Did friends and family judge us? Yes they did. Would I have waited a little bit longer to get married? No way. I am 100% aware that what I did was a little bit crazy, but Ben and I felt super good about getting married so that is what we did. And yes my love story was a terrible example of ‘the secret to a perfect relationship,’ but no one is perfect.