Parenting

Purpose of Parenting

What is the purpose of parenting to you? Parenting has different meanings for everyone but they are all important. I do not have kids yet but it is important for me to write down what I think the purpose of parenting is. Once I have my list I can evaluate it with my husband and decide why those particular things are important and what we can do to become better parents.

My list for the purpose of parenting: teach the gospel, have my children develop passions, teach them to be kind and loving, teach good communication skills, and protect and prepare them to thrive in the world.

Why become a parent?

Why have kids when you and your spouse are living in a one bedroom apartment, have student loan debt, and have a low income paying job? I believe that you and your spouse will both feel when the time is right to have children, even if you both are really poor. Personally I would not have children right now because I am really young and still have a year left in school, maybe three more years if I get my Master’s degree. But, when the time comes and I feel like I need to start having children than I will, even if I am still in school and poor.

I think that we all need to look at the bigger picture sometimes and realize that if God prompts us to do something than he is not going to leas us astray. Being a parent is a calling and I think that it’ll make me and my husband become better people. Parenting is going to be hard but it will give me qualities that I do not currently have. As of right now I think that I am a little bit selfish, but when I have children I will have to become selfless. Selflessness is a quality that we all have to work hard for and it is never going to come easy to anyone.

Parental Approach

Once you and your spouse decides to have children, you both need to talk about parental approaches. The technique that you use to parent your children will shape them into who they are. It is so important that you and your spouse agree on how you parent and make sure that your children know that their mom and dad love and care for each other. I know multiple families where the mother always says yes to their children but they dad always has to be the one to tell their children no. Using the good cop/bad cop technique will only make your children resent the bad cop parent.

Some useful parent techniques would be to offer contact freely. All people need contact because it makes them feel important and loved. Be open and give hugs and offer to cuddle with your child. Another technique is to teach your children to contribute. Chores is a good example because that helps your kids to learn responsibility and they will have a purpose in your household. Every day you should have a chore list that your children should complete, it can be as simple as watering the plants or walking the dog.

Another good parental approach would be to give your children choices and have them face their consequences. For example, in elementary school I wanted to wear a new hat I got from California to school even though I was not aloud to wear a hat to school. My mother gave me a choice to wear my new hat to school, wear it right after school ends, or have my mother put my hair up in a pony tail. I decided to wear a hat, but my teacher made me take it off and I was embarrassed because my hair was really messy. In this situation my mother obviously knew that I was going to have to take my hat off at school, but she gave me choices so that I could learn to follow the rules at school.